Ramblings…

Published January 4, 2013 by emotionless brain

I sit here pondering will my love for my children be enough? I am not a warm fuzzy kind of person. I am loving, I love, I am not physical, I am not emotional. My children are very different than I am in that aspect, my daughter is a bouncy happy energetic albeit DRAMA QUEEN, that never suffers sensory overload. My son is constantly on sensory overload, somewhat edgy, loving, but fearful. They share a birthday in different years, for sharing birthdays they are two very different people. 

I wonder do I show them enough love? How could I ever express how I feel about them, they are my offspring, (I now truly understand the expression) “the fruit of my loins”. I am not one for many descriptive words, but fewer more powerful words. My daughter wants more more more, never enough. My son is learning less can be more. I hug and kiss them as many times possible in a day, when they are asleep at night I sneak in and kiss them and tell them I love them again.

I cannot afford to “buy them” all the new and popular things, instead I try to make due with what we have, and focus on what we do have vs what we do not have, 

Material things, status symbols, want, buy, get. Does it ever stop. I remember as a child my most memorable Chaunakah gift was a Mickey Mouse pencil sharpener that when you put the pencil in Mickey;s mouth, the mouth moved like it was eating the pencil. I loved it and had it for many many years (what ever happened to it?). The next memorable gift was an electronic game called “speak and spell”. It was one of the very first electronic personal games, I played that for many years too. 

My kids do not remember from year to year what they get as gifts, is society so dulled by greed that it is all disposable? 

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