I had an interesting conversation with a guy friend this past weekend. I mentioned that it had been a few months since I had any physical attention, and I was wishing I could find some “good loving” without any hassles. He said “shouldn’t be a problem, guys are easy”. Well my dear sir, as it happens most guys are not that easy, no more so than most girls. The problem is I live in my head to much these days and two things will get you killed… AIDS and Getting Caught. So suffice it to say that my ability to find a one night stand went away 15 years ago (yes before I even met my husband).
I began taking a back seat to watch what other people were doing, and how they were doing it (no you perv not the sex part), but how men and wimmin interacted in various settings. I watched married and non married gay and straight (sorry no bestiality). It never ceased to amaze me how lackadaisical people were/are about themselves and each other. No semblance of loyalties in any capacity, not to themselves and not to each other,
Fast forward to today, and as much as I may want to get laid, I cannot bring myself to have “casual sex” anymore. First I have to have a level of attraction with the other person, second they have to be able to carry an intelligent conversation, third they also have to be somewhat refined (a conversation I had with a girlie this past weekend too) which admittedly ties into the second requirement. Fourth they have to also have a practicing sense of hygiene (you’d be surprised), and while there are more prerequisites for a ‘sex partner” I have to stop and ask myself; if I am going to all this trouble to outline my minimal requirements for sex, why bother? Without the right chemistry it just is not worth it, when you add chemistry into the mix, then you have a relationship.
So I am back to fantasizing about days gone by when relationships and sex were easily found, and easily lost. But for today, I still am not convinced that all people are designed to have “intimate relationships/boyfriends”. So if and until I do stumble upon another intimate encounter I will be fantasizing…